My husband started his affair Sept. 29, 2010, with a woman who has the characteristics of borderline personality disorder. He says he don't know what attracted him sexually to her, doesn't know why he made the choice to betray me, says he was happily married to me and loved me. She was a entry level new temp. He says she was not attractive in appearance, she was older than me (38) by ten years, older than him (45) by two. He says she was flat chested and flabby. That she was dead in bed, after a month, she wanted anal sex, and preferred it. He said two weeks after the affair started that he became more aware of how wrong it was, started to see mood swings in her and tried to end it saying since she was now longer working with him, it needed to end and go back home 325 miles and she could no call him on his phone. She said it doesn't need to end and she would get him a phone. The affair in November & December consisted in two meetings each month for sex, in which he says she begged and begged for him to met her in which he says he did not want to but did to get her to leave him alone. Two of the four of those times she had drove 325 miles to get here rented a hotel room, in which he would not met her at, and requested that she drive an additional 30 miles and had sex with her in a gravel pit in front bucket seats of vehicles. In 1st week of January she drove here 350 miles one way and meet her in motel, where she insisted on anal sex. He says after that time in January he decided no more because, 1. he realized how wrong he was being to me 2. He was turned off by her as a person to include the anal sex. 3. He realized how much he really loved me and did not want to lose me. He continued cell phone contact with her, told her he needed a break made excuses of being busy. We went to Mexico in January, romantic trip he planned in October, as the affair began, and also remodeled our house that spring. In May 2011, he met with her as she wanted to talk to him and give him new updated phone. They met in secret did not have sex, but she kissed him a few times, in which he did not totally reject. Later, she called asking him to met her for sex, he told her he was busy at work. Then she in June she request they meet at the gravel pit they had met at twice before to talk, he met her in secret again. she tried to advance sex, he told her it over, he tried to give back phone she would not accept. He then claimed to her he had to go because I might be on my way there. She later text she was so upset with him that she ran her van in a ditch and broke her ribs and was in a hospital. She begged him in August to met a motel they were at once in 2011. He again told her it's over. She text him telling him she had new job and men were taking her out for dinner. He told her that was great. She sent him text picture of tattoo with blue crying eyes down into broken blacken heart with dagger through it and his initial's, and the words "Love Kills" They met again in October 2011 at a church yard whereas they had met during the affair in 2010. Whereas my husband says she arrived smiling and he had prepare what he was to say. Her smile disappeared he told her angrily it was over, should have never happened, she cried, and tore off, almost losing control. She had told him she was going to tell his wife. She called him and said that he looked at her as if his looks could kill. A few weeks later her son called him, said she was a missing person. She later text him saying all was alright. He never answered any calls or text again, but she continue to text, into 2012, in August she sent him a suicide poem, sent him " I see you and time to play, also she would never contact again. November 2012, she got new phone number pretended to be her daughter, sent text saying she passed away September 2012, and he could contact her to get some of her personal documents/ journal. He never responded. Thought is was a ploy. Dec. 26,2012 she began to e-mail me, but I did not open.. Until she called Jan. 12,2013, she said check your e-mail and hung up. She sent me a picture of him, the tattoo, the poem claimed she had become pregnant lost the child at six months and never told him. Sent dates and places of motel there where at in 2010. And a lot of half truths and some lies. She did this while claiming to be her daughter faking death by suicide. I knew she was playing a game, and it was her. She wanted me to feel sorry for her and think she was no longer in the picture because she was dead, she wanted to hurt me so much I would leave him. She wanted another swing. He swears he never loved her, doesn't know how he could have ever been with her, says her realized something wrong with her. Says after her he realized how much he loved me and didn't know how to get her gone. He has told me all the details that she did not. He is in pain as he realizes how much pain he cause me and broke my heart. He let me quite working out and has cared for me and held me. He says he would do anything to make it up to me and is. He says he wishes he could go back and change it all. He says he only loves me, and she was only a mistake he made when stupid and she wouldn't let him go. I know he realizes how bad he hurt me. and tells me he doesn't care about her or her feelings at all, doesn't think about her unless I insist by questioning him about details. He says he will never hurt be again and he made that decision two years before, when he stopped having sex with her, Jan 2011. He was exposed by her Jan 2013, and has been trying to make it up to me on a greater level ever since. Does this all sound typical of the man who loves his wife, got stupid, got stuck, tried to end it, tried to move on and forget what he had done. Tried to make it up to me his wife? Does he love me, as I feel he does or am I just a fool like the other woman wants me to believe that I am?